The Trials Of Gladys Crunchbuttock

This is the story of deeply misunderstood member of Bewdley Women's Institute, genteel by nature one minute, yet vicious and fanatical the next when it came to defending her good name and her left toe nail, following various strange incidents that took place near her villa in the ice-cream infested hills of Italy.

 

Unknown to others outside the highly secretive committee of the WI Coven in Bewdley, she possessed certain skills gained during her life as a Clotted Cream Welder in the Spotted Dick and Broccoli Mines of Cumbria.

 

This is her story ..... so far

 

 

CHAPTER ONE

"Crunchbuttock Arrested For Sheep Rustling"

 

 

 

SPECULATION CONTINUES TO INCREASE IN BEWDLEY WOMEN'S INSTITUTE AS TO WHETHER MRS GLADYS CRUNCHBUTTOCK IS INDEED GUILTY OF ANY CRIME AT ALL, OR A SIMPLE BYSTANDER WHO GOT CAUGHT UP IN EVENTS BEYOND HER CONTROL. TO HELP YOU MAKE UP YOUR OWN MIND WE HOPE THE FOLLOWING ACCOUNT OF WHAT ACTUALLY TOOK PLACE WILL BE OF USE.

 

Tuesday 8th September

 

Headlines in the Kidderminster Shuttle, Il Centro and The Oberstdorf Gazette this morning reported the following:

 

"Crunchbuttock Arrested For Sheep Rustling"

 

"Well known British socialite and Women's Institute President Elect (Bewdley and Husum Branch) Mrs Gladys Crunchbuttock was yesterday morning arrested near her home in Bellante, Italy for sheep rustling and taken in handcuffs to the local Guardia Da Sheep station.

 

Once there she was questioned by the head of the Guardia Da Sheep for the region, Major Stefano Di BaBa Blacksheep.

 

 

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