The Beencounters Wife



 Mario & Stefania


The Bean Counters Wife

(An addendum to Chapter Two on Bean Counters)


It was a sad day for the staff at the bank in Igygusssukyyyyybach when the head Bean Counter Mr Alfred Pickle had actually failed to get any money from that horrible

Italian couple and in particular for Gwendolen who was one of the cashiers.

The banks Abacus had often broken down before when Gwendolen had another

of her frequent sodding headaches. This was to do with Alfred that prat of a husband of hers who worked at regional office, who kept taking Trebor mints,

after Marcus (Who works in the "Lets F*** Everyone Off By Keeping Them Waiting On Customer Service Lines As Long As Possible Department) told him "They're really big Viagra pills" and they'd been trying for a baby for 48 years

but Alfred, being of limited intellect and imagination was still not sure how to achieve this, other than somewhere along the line a "Stork" was involved.

To him anything to do with sex was a complete and utter mystery other than it had something to do with that horrible thing between his legs and where did the bloody

Stork fit in? As such of course Gwendolen was to blame, it was obviously all her fault.

After yet another exhausting and fruitless night, when despite trying everything she knew to get him even remotely hard and failing miserably, she'd eventually given up and strapped him to the BUSGR (The Banks Universal Self Gratification Robot). It was supposed to be a perk of the job instead of a a company car, it never broke down and it was cheap to run), even though he didn't even wake up somehow

it was still her fault (Although he had begun to wonder if he might have Piles).





 Soon after she ran away to Bognor, married the BUSGR and was never seen again.